Telephone conversations – Meeting both rational and emotional

October 13, 2026|Accountants, Kim's Blog, Lawyers, Marketing, Relationship Management, Selling|

At the latest MBL workshop on “Pick up the phone – client service and sales opportunities for professionals” we looked at the role of telephone calls in sales and service, managing inbound calls and making outbound calls. Delegates from legal and accountancy firms – both technical experts (fee-earners) and business development professionals – raised great questions and drove insightful conversations. But I wanted to focus on one aspect of telephone conversations – Meeting both rational and emotional needs.

In any interaction, there are two needs. The obvious rational needs focus on obtaining the required information or securing the best deal. The emotional needs are more varied and might include: to connect with the person you are speaking to, to feel heard and understood, being treated as an individual with respect, feeling safe and, of course, a positive experience.

Most systems and training support people managing the rational aspects of the call. But when so much modern communication is digital, we under-estimate the value of human connection. And a telephone call presents a big opportunity to make that human connection – where rapport, trust, preference and relationships start. Those handling calls draw on their emotional intelligence to achieve the best personal connection and call outcome. (see Emotional Intelligence in legal practice (Globe’s Fundamental Skills)

Rational needs

Rational needs are a relatively straightforward part of the call to manage. A caller requires information – details of the service provided, the cost and the timeframe. And some callers – as a result of their personality or situation – will lean towards quick, rational calls.

The danger is that those handling calls focus entirely on the rational needs and overlook or fail to address the emotional needs.

There’s a bit of a cultural and structural problem too. People sometimes wrongly assume that being professional means being emotion-free. I admit that I held this misconception in my early career. Older workplace norms favoured a stoic, detached attitude. Professionalism does not exclude emotions, it requires emotional regulation (Emotional Regulation – A key element of Emotional Intelligence (EQ)) and appropriate expression.

There are many ways to support those managing calls with the rational aspects of calls:

Databases and CRM systems holding details of the caller – details of their online journey and their likely needs based on similar types of callers
Artificial Intelligence (AI) and automation that prompt you with the appropriate questions to guide you through the process to elicit the required information from the firm’s perspective – to populate the firm’s systems and qualify calls
Briefings about the various services – indicators of need, common questions, the firm’s strengths etc
Knowledge banks of the firm’s experts, services and case studies of similar client situations to enable call handlers to quickly access relevant information and evidence
Brand guidelines on how to talk about the firm, its values and services
Briefings to guide calls through frequently asked questions (FAQs) and address common objections
Price lists to support the formulation of estimates and quotes
Terms and Conditions describing how your firm does business
Email templates showing the typical information to send to follow-up calls

Whilst callers may think they may decide on purely rational criteria – such as location, availability or price – most will (perhaps subconsciously) have an emotional element to their decision. Science backs this up.

All professional firms provide a broadly similar service. They have essentially the same training, technical expertise, knowledge and systems. Firms differentiate on how they deliver that service – the client experience and their relationship management approach. And those are felt emotionally.

Emotional needs

Let’s consider the potential range of emotions at play at the caller’s end of the telephone conversation:

Distress from a real or potential physical, financial or moral injury
Sadness about loss of property or a person
Fear about consequences of action or inaction
Anxiety about a critical decision
Trepidation about uncertainty and risk
Excitement about a new venture or opportunity
Desperation for a fast solution
Irritation that they can’t get their own way
Impatience
Inadequate at their lack of knowledge
Anger at an unfair situation
Pressure to find the right professional at the right price
Insecurity and uncertainty about asking the right questions and making the right choice

Now let’s contemplate which emotions might be involved for the person taking a call:

Nervousness about what the caller may ask and whether they will know how to answer
Discomfort about the nature of the enquiry
Stress about managing calls on a range of topics within tight deadlines
Fear of making a mistake in how to answer callers’ questions
Pressure to “hurry along” a talkative caller
Embarrassment that they don’t know the answer
Lack of confidence that they are “clicking” with the caller
Shame that they don’t know the answers to a caller’s questions
Intimidated by an assertive or “powerful” caller
Anxiety about where the call is going and its outcome
Doubt in their professional ability

On telephone calls, you often have little information helping you decide on how best to support the caller. Are they familiar with the topic and require a prompt answer to their fact-based question? Are they unsure and seeking reassurance that you connect with them and their situation? Are they feeling strong emotions but need you to remain dispassionate so that they can hold it together? Or are they hoping you will demonstrate that you understand the enormity of the emotions they are feeling?

On telephone calls you can’t see the non-verbal communication (Non-Verbal Communication (NVC) – the basics (Video)) that you may rely on when meeting face-to-face. You miss micro-expressions and are left in the dark during a silence (Are they still there? Are they thinking? Are they making notes? Are they consulting a colleague?)

In some calls, the person taking the call is acting as a co-regulator for the caller’s emotions. Your voice at the other end of the line helps them slow down, calm down and regain their composure.

There isn’t a “one size fits all” answer on how to manage telephone calls – you assess and adapt to the caller’s needs. Telephone skills – Focus on the caller’s needs – Kim Tasso

By listening, empathizing, asking questions, reflecting back and responding authentically you WILL make a connection and start to create rapport (How to build rapport – An essential guide – Kim Tasso). And then you are on your way to securing trust and a client relationship.

Delegate conclusions

Most compelling image:

Dogs, Cats, Bears dog, cat and bear personalities – Better business relationships
Disney emotions from Inside Out
Relationship pyramid
Shoes (empathy) An introduction to emotional intelligence (EQ) and empathy (Video)
Radiator Confidence – Radiators and Drains and the 90 second rule
Detective

Most interesting or valuable idea

Building rapport How to build rapport – An essential guide – Kim Tasso
Don’t make assumptions about what callers know
Turn features into benefits
Make the call memorable (for the right reasons)

Planned actions

Choose a call framework
Experiment with different approaches
Do more research (using AI tools as appropriate)
Consistent follow up

Delegate poll results

Your background:

33% Business development/selling
67% Fee-earner – delivering professional advice to clients

Which sector do you represent:

67% Legal
33% Accountancy/insolvency

Have you had sales training:

100% No and I’ve no experience

How confident are you taking and making telephone calls

67% Average
33% High

Which topic is of most interest to you

50% Improving client service on telephone calls
50% Using the telephone to reach people proactively (initiate or enhance relationships)

How would you assess your emotional intelligence? An introduction to emotional intelligence (EQ) and empathy (Video) and Emotional Intelligence in legal practice (Globe’s Fundamental Skills

33% High
67% Average

Do you think your personality is mostly: dog, cat and bear personalities – Better business relationships

67% Dog
33% Cat
0% Bear

Are you clear on your message (value proposition) when taking and making calls?

33% Yes, agreed before each campaign/call
33% Sort of, I have an idea what I want to convey
33% No – I need to learn what the client needs first

How good is your technical “product/service” knowledge

67% Good – I have training/experience
33% Average – Sometimes I struggle to understand what clients want and our relevant services

How well do you know stories that reflect different client challenges and how your firm has solved them? Video – The art of storytelling – Kim Tasso explains