I sent this information as a mailer to my clients and contacts recently and the feedback was really positive. Some suggested I should publish it as a blog post so that it could be seen by more people. So here is an article on resources to help you deal with difficult interactions.
We have lots of “difficult” interactions
We are often required to manage “difficult” interactions. Some estimates suggest that 25% of a leader’s time is spent dealing with conflict. I’ve been called upon recently to help clients resolve various “difficulties”– between business owners, board members and team colleagues. I draw on a range of business skills and psychology/counselling training to do this.
So I thought it might be helpful to share some resources to build your knowledge and “soft” skills to help you deal more effectively with “difficult” interactions.
Videos to help you deal with difficult interactions
A couple of my more recent short videos have summarised models to help understand, reduce and manage conflict:
- Problems can arise if you don’t invest time in stakeholder engagement and building buy-in – here’s an animal magic approach to buy-in (10 minutes)
- Increasing your empathy and emotional intelligence (EQ) helps improve all interactions (8 minutes)
- You can improve communication and relationships by developing your active listening skills (10 minutes)
- Understanding the basics of change management can help you avoid resistance (10 minutes)
- People experience different emotions as they face change (8 mins)
- Coaching skills can help you convey challenging messages and develop your staff and improve their performance (10 mins)
- How to break out of the drama triangle with people adopting a victim, persecutor or rescuer role (6 minutes)
- Transactional Analysis (TA) shows that difficulties can arise when people slip from adult into parent or child mode (PAC model) (7 minutes)
- Increasing your self-confidence and confidence can help you manage difficulties more easily (8 minutes)
- Difficulties can arise due to personality differences and reduced by adapting your style (5 minutes)
- And when you feel worn down by difficulties, it helps if you can build your resilience (10 minutes)
Articles on dealing with difficult interactions
- The Law Society Law Management Section published my article on building resilience
- How to build rapport – An essential guide – Kim Tasso
- Here are some techniques to help you deal with difficult conversations
- Working with arrogant people
- Facilitate groups to encourage participation
- Performance management and the art of giving feedback
- When people complain and are angry
- The value of face-to-face communications and reframing
- Seven tips for conflict management
- Nine ideas for better conflict management
- Managing up, boundaries and broken relationships
- When your boss is a micromanaging “control freak”
- Working with people who are stubborn or have fixed views
- Assertiveness skills – getting what you want and how to say No
- How to get a word in at a meeting where people keep talking
- Healthy boundaries at home and at work – how to set and maintain
Book reviews addressing difficult interactions and conflict resolution
- How to manage your emotions so they don’t manage you
- This is an excellent book on conversational skills for leaders
- Recently I reviewed this book by Tony Whatling on Mediation
- Heidi Grant’s book on getting people to help you
- The neuroscience of organisational change by Hilary Scarlett
- One of my favourite books on negotiation was written by Simon Horton
- Another great book on negotiation is Never split the difference: Negotiating by Chris Voss
- I really liked the unusual approach – the idea of conversational riffs – adopted by Neil Denny in his book on creating meaning out of conflict
- My book on Essential Soft Skills for Lawyers – published by Globe Law and Business last year – looks at a range of soft skills for avoiding and dealing with difficulties
Please let me know what resources you use to help you deal with “difficult” interactions.
