Buy in – Influence and Persuasion Toolbox

March 3, 2025|Accountants, Kim's Blog, Lawyers, Management Skills, Marketing, Psychology, Relationship Management, Selling|

At the recent PM Forum training workshop on “Buy in, engagement and stakeholder management” there was much discussion about influence and persuasion. Delegates were from law and accountancy firms. I’ve pulled together many of the ideas on influence and persuasion to create a toolbox as an additional learning resource for delegates. Buy in – Influence and Persuasion Toolbox.

What’s the difference between influence and persuasion?

Influence is having a vision of the ideal outcome for a situation or organization and then, without using force or coercion, motivating people to work together towards making the vision a reality. It’s the ability to subtly guide or inspire change. It is long term and positive, builds trust and credibility and often involves leading by example.

Persuasion is presenting a case in such a way that it sways the opinion of others, makes people believe certain information or motivates a decision. It’s about making a compelling argument for change and is used for immediate and specific changes when there are time constraints.

Persuasion can be used to spur someone to action or to make a decision without actually earning their sincere buy-in. With influence, dedicating time to win someone’s heart or earn mindshare is a prerequisite to inspiring them to take action or make a particular decision.

So influence is something we develop as a personal attribute whereas persuasion skills are learned and applied to specific situations. And this suggests that the more influence we possess, the less we need to persuade. It’s like the saying by Drucker “’the aim of marketing is to make selling superfluous” becoming “The aim of influence to is make persuasion superfluous”.

It’s interesting to note that in the recent BTI survey of 121 law firm marketing leaders – Relationship and influence skills was one of the seven “make or break” skills CMO’s Pinpoint 7 Make or Break Skills to Bet On – The BTI Consulting Group

Develop your influence

Developing your influence is part and parcel of building your personal brand – how people perceive you. How to create and promote your personal brand – Kim Tasso

The early work of Daniel Priestly Building a personal brand – Key Person of Influence suggested using SALT:

Social footprint
Awards and associations
Live appearances
Third party media mentions

His five-step process was summarised as: Perfect Pitch, Publish your ideas, Productise your value, Profile raising and Partnerships.

I was surprised to learn that research indicates (Harvey J Coleman “Empowering yourself: The Organisational Game Revealed”):

Performance is only 10% of the consideration for promotion
Image accounts for 30% and
Exposure (visibility) for 60%

In this article Be more visible – the PVI model I describe the Perception – Visibility – Impact model. I also outline Garfinkle’s five characteristics of an influential person

A solid reputation
An enhanced skill set
Affability
The power to persuade
Executive presence

He then describes the 16 behaviours of executive presence Be more visible – the PVI model

Back in 2018, I assembled ideas around making a personal impact – to stand out, speak up and make a difference. How do you make a personal impact – Make a difference It covered:

Appearance – How are you perceived?
1. Look the part
2. Feel the part
3. Be yourself (authenticity)
Drive – What motivates you?
1. Have a purpose
2. Set goals
3. Strive to be better
Communications – What do you say and how do you say it?
1. Engage openly and honestly
2. See things from other people’s perspective (empathy)
3. Use power and influence wisely
Action – What do you do?
1. Share knowledge and success
2. Take the lead
3. Create change

Some people may find it helpful to enhance their assertiveness skills in order to be perceived differently Assertiveness skills – getting what you want and saying “No”. I also suggest “Be more Jessica Pearson” using the PAI (Presence, Authority, Impact) model assertiveness, impact and effectiveness

Power is clearly a fundamental part of influence. French and Raven’s identified five bases of power:

Legitimate
Reward
Expert
Referent
Coercive

“Charisma is an individual’s ability to attract and influence other people. While it is often described as a mysterious quality that one either has or doesn’t have, some experts argue that the skills of charismatic people can be learned and cultivated”.

A variety of factors make a person charismatic. These include: confidence, exuberance, optimism, expressive body language and a passionate voice. People with charisma are often enthusiastic and speak with assertiveness. This article explores Charisma | Psychology Today United Kingdom – the art and science of charisma and how to develop charisma.

I recently saw a LinkedIn post which offered six steps to develop charism:

Understand yourself (develop self-awareness) An introduction to emotional intelligence (EQ) and empathy (Video)
Show genuine interest
Communicate clearly
Use positive body language Non-Verbal Communication (NVC) – the basics (Video)
Express confidence Soft skills – Boost your self-confidence and confidence (Video)
Share stories Book review: Unleash the power of storytelling by Rob Biesenbach

And six practical tops for more charisma:

Remember details
Be adaptable
Stay informed
Generate positive energy
Use humour
Ask questions Why are questions so important? (Questioning skills)

This classic book captures many of the ideas Book review “How to win friends and influence people” by Dale Carnegie

Improve your persuasion skills

If we understand the science relating to decision-making then we can use the appropriate persuasion techniques.

Learning about decision-making processes can assist us in persuasion. For example, in Book review: Nudge: Improving decisions about health, wealth Thaler and Sustain consider behavioural science and how unconscious forces such as emotion and cognitive biases affect our decision making. They consider ways to present choices that nudged people in the right direction. They illustrated techniques such as availability, boomerang effect, conformity, framing, priming, loss aversion and defaults.

Three fundamental elements of persuasion are:

Questioning to explore Why are questions so important? (Questioning skills) and then
Listening, to show interest You’re not listening – What you’re missing and develop
Empathy An introduction to emotional intelligence (EQ) and empathy (Video)

Once you have empathy, you are able to tailor your argument to meet the specific needs of the person you are trying to persuade. In Book review – Persuasion: The art of influencing people by James Borg a variety of persuasion techniques are explored. He talks about the importance of listening, attention, body language, memory, psycholinguistics, negotiating skills and interaction.

Aristotle developed a model of the three pillars of persuasion: Influence and persuasion skills with Aristotle and Knights and Dinosaurs

Ethos – Credibility (see personal brand above)
Logos – Logic and rationality (facts, figures, data, evidence, research)
Pathos – Emotion (vulnerability, stories, metaphor, surprise, images)

I also suggest keeping your communications concise, they are more persuasive if they harness the power of three Power of three – Writing and presentation basics (Video)

Cialdini identified the six principles of the psychology of persuasion Influence – Cialdini’s six principles of the psychology of persuasion

Scarcity
Reciprocity
Consistency and commitment
Social proof
Liking
Authority

Continuing the theme of behavioural insights, the EAST framework was developed by the Behavioural Insights Team (BIT) in 2012 to help policy makers promote change. The EAST framework for behavioural nudges in marketing? To change behaviour, an intervention must be:

Easy
Attractive
Social
Timely

Storytelling is now accepted as a powerful way to engage and persuade people. In Book review: Unleash the power of storytelling by Rob Biesenbach he talks about using purpose, power and impact. He describes how to use story to capitalise on emotion in storytelling.

I show how to incorporate many persuasion techniques in writing in this article Persuasive writing checklist

Getting people together so that they engage and take responsibility for what is discussed is explored in an article on Consulting Skills – The power of workshops – Kim Tasso

This article: fixed views and closed to new ideas (dealing with stubbornness) explores how you can use a range of influence and persuasion skills to work with people who have fixed views and are closed to new ideas

There’s an old proverb that says:

“You say it – they doubt it,

you argue it – they defend it,

you prove it – they diminish it,

they say it – they believe it”.

Hopefully, your persuasion skills are strong enough to achieve consensus. But if not, then it may be time to look at your negotiation skills Negotiating skills – Balancing task and relationship

Other points raised during the session on buy in and stakeholder management

We used the 7 P model of Buy In© and during exercises and discussions, several ideas emerged

Rational
- Plan
- Process & Precision
- Pressure
- Patience
Emotional
- People
- Psychology
- Persuasion

Process/evidence

Tender data and statistics, timelines, evidence of tender win rates and success rates of bids per sector
For lead generation, tangible monetary metrics based on CRM data
Number of alumni registered on the programme, and where they work (e.g. at clients) and evidence on alumni influence in work opportunities
Explain in clear language to stakeholders what things mean (marketing acronyms for example)
Financial information to set realistic goals – and measure progress
Client listening reports – evidence from “the horse’s mouth”

Plan

Change can be difficult as even with a plan or business case, there’s little time to reflect with a busy day to day so what usually happens is that the same processes are repeated in the next project (habit)
An alternative approach on revising plans – where fee-earners are wedded to their ideas, rather than saying no and giving alternatives, instead be patient and try to build a plan around their ideas. This will give structure and process, and deadlines to what they want to do

Pressure

Things that are out of our control (political changes, E.G. tax changes)
Competitor projects and developments to build more buy-in momentum.

Apply stakeholder management and buy-in tools to a CRM scenario

I mentioned this excellent resource to assist with stakeholder mapping How to create a stakeholder map [templates & examples] | Mural

A group exercise considered how to encourage partners to use a new CRM system. The combined ideas included:

Plan

Establish clear vision and goals (what will success look like?)
Develop a plan on how to roll out the project
Engage senior people and nay-sayers in planning the project
Anticipate potential objections and how to overcome them

Stakeholder management

Consider the different generations and their attitudes – there may be more motivation amongst younger generations
Engage department heads and senior fee-earners and encourage them to be champions and role models
Involve different groups – senior fee-earners, junior fee-earners and administrators – in discussions (possibly using workshops or action teams)
Learn the perspectives (develop empathy) with different stakeholder groups

Pilot project

Select a small group of highly motivated fee-earners to run a pilot
Adjust plans and processes to reflect the feedback and learnings from the pilot

Project management

Build a strong project team with representatives from different stakeholder groups
Ensure there are adequate resources for all stages of the project
Develop KPIs and track and report progress
Test all of the processes and iron out issues early
Gamify the process – make it fun and competitive

Communication

Prepare a comprehensive internal communications plan
Reposition CRM from administration to a powerful tool to help fee-earners
Explain the benefits to each person/team
Provide best practice examples
Use real life examples to demonstrate use and success
Report on the quick wins and success stories (especially financials)
Communicate developments and successes on a regular basis through a variety of channels (team meetings, newsletters, intranets, internal messaging, awards etc)
Provide constant reminders of the value of the system
Respond quickly to questions and suggestions about the system

Training and coaching

Appoint CRM champions (cheerleaders) in each team
Prepare departmental or team exemplars to provide local support
Develop a variety of online, on demand tools
Provide examples and templates to make the process easier
Provide regular support to those using the system – at a time that suits them
Support everyone in developing productive habits

Delegate views

Delegate aims

To be included in the loop (early) when fee-earners discuss initiatives
Encourage partners to engage with and adhere to deadlines
To be listened to and heard
Set clear boundaries that we are doing this to benefit them
Promote change in fee-earner behaviour
Help fee-earners understand why MBD request and suggest the things we do
Support the roll-out of a CRM project
Counteract the rumour mill
Convey urgency without provoking overwhelm or resistance
Learn how to manage too much demand for MBD services
Respond well when fee-earners react to our push back

Delegate key takeaways

Build my own influence
Pick one partner per week to develop a relationship with
Split stakeholders into groups of influence to make the task feel less overwhelming
How it might feel being on the other side if something hasn’t been explained or too much information is given
Limit to three reminders (butt this is dependent on company culture)
Question fee-earners on how we can work better together
Consider gamification in communications and tasks with fee-earners
Acknowledge constraints of other teams who also have deadlines and resource issues
Use the great tools (look forward to “finding time” to do all the background reading)
Create processes to be collaborative and streamlined across the BD team
Work together to make the changes and adopt processes in a streamlined way (it cannot just be one person doing it or they won’t last for the long term!)
Be clear in my communication with partners